Sunday morning musings

12/9/12....2 days post surgery for TJ and I'm off on FMLA until the 21st. Surgery went well. He's still having some post op pain but he's walking with crutches and moving his leg to keep it from getting stiff and to increase his range of motion.

Lennox (the pitbull puppy) is being a total brat. His best friend, Harley the cat, loves to instigate shit with him. Even using white vinegar in a spray bottle does little to slow their antics.

I'm getting ready to clean out Facebook again, people that I don't interact with mostly. I don't care that I don't have 1000s of *friends*. If you don't have any interaction with them what's the point of having that many?

Still feeling the effects of betrayal from people I *thought* were as close as sisters and would be there if I ever needed them. Guess I was wrong. I think that the *upfront and honest*, *speak your mind*, etc only applied if it AGREED with them.

Along those lines, I don't really care for people who take credit for something they DIDN'T do. TJ and I worked for over a month, collecting every medical record possible, test results, x-rays, etc. before submitting a claim to the VA through the DAV. Having someone actually make the claim "I forgot, I know who told you how to get your benefits started".....uh, NO. Someone told TJ they would give him the name of the person THEY used to file the VA claim for a family member.....that NEVER happened.  We KNEW who to go to help file the claim, we just wanted to use someone that was recommended.  That never happened.  Don't start screaming to the world that YOU are responsible for a successful VA claim.

Thanks to everyone who has been supportive during TJ's surgery and recovery, especially Daddy and Johronia (TJ's cousin) who sat with me at the surgery center.  This has shown me who my friends really are.

Gibbs Slap

Lennox aka "Kudzu"

Scooter and the "Pit crew"

Give me a freakin' break.

I'm surrounded by conspiracy nuts.  They see something on the Internet and it HAS to be true....they can't put anything on the Internet that isn't true, right????  WRONG.

The are NO "mosquito" drones spying on the US and injecting poison.

There is NO requirement in Obamacare that will demand everyone get an RFID chip implanted by March 2013.

Contrails are NOT "chemtrails"....anybody with a fucking ounce of common sense would know that 35,000 feet is too high to be effective.

And the list goes on and on and on......

New home for now

Well, 1 more day before Multiply (or should I say Subtract) shuts down the blogging side of the house and goes strictly to SE Asia "Marketplace" spammers.  What once was a decent blogging platform is turning into an online flea market.  What a way to treat over 6 million bloggers in comparison to just a few 100,000 flea market sellers.  Even the sellers didn't want the blogging side to be shut down.  Way to go Stef, don't listen to anybody.  Little arrogant on your part.  We won't even bring up the condescending way you talked to us bloggers, in the 3rd person.  Guess what, you ain't *all that*.  I'm taking bets on how long the Multiply flea market will last.....

The Planes of September

The Planes Of September

The people walked about the land

They mused their dreams, they made their plans

Souls moral and false, natures careless and kind

Jarred rudely awake at the quarter of nine

Innocents evolved into terrorists and timber,

Black was the smoke from the planes of September

So the people, they stopped, they shuddered and cried

They screamed at the scandal of safety defied

They listened to lectures and rumors of war

Felt the confusion, watched the doom-numbers soar

They saw reason scorch in evil's hot embers

Bright were the flames from the planes of September

So symbols were bashed and humanity burned

History sighed and another page turned

The people had fallen, face down in the dust

Would they arise to be strong as they must?

Be assured that they shall, as they mourn and remember

The rage, death and hope from the planes of September

~2001, Jessica Purser, 16 years old

My Feeling on Dec 1. decision

Opinions please

TJ has a Cherokee rose tattoo in memory of his mother. He wants to get one for me...a bear with the Blackfeet tribal colors. I had found a bear her really likes and I took it into Paint last night and added the colors (it didn't do a great job but you'll get the idea).

Any suggestions on changing around the colors? He's also having my name, in the Blackfeet language, tattooed above it.

I also want one for him but we can't think of what it should be. Ideas?

And it just continues on....

I lost a cousin today...no, not to death, but I'm probably dead to her now. I make no bones about supporting gay rights because it affects MY family and some of my close friends. Apparently I'm going to absolutely burn in hell over it. I was deleted and blocked by my *Christian* cousin who called me a *shit stick* and said another of my friends could *kiss my ass*. Doesn't sound like a very *Christ-like* attitude. I AM for equal rights under the law for ALL citizens. I AM against all of the same arguments that were used when rights were being denied to American Indians, women, blacks and interracial couples. When we don't speak up when rights are denied to one group who will speak up when WE become the next group? I would rather be loved for who I am and what I stand for than love for what I'm NOT.

First they came for the communists,

and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a communist.

Then they came for the trade unionists,

and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews,

and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a Jew.

Then they came for me

and there was no one left to speak out for me.

~Martin Niem�ller

Heart of a dog

"It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them. And every new dog who comes into my life gifts me with a piece of their heart. If I live long enough, all the components of my heart will be dog, and I will become as generous and loving as they are."
--Unknown

I am an island

A winter's day

In a deep and dark December;

I am alone,

Gazing from my window to the streets below

On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow.

I am a rock,

I am an island.

I've built walls,

A fortress deep and mighty,

That none may penetrate.

I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.

It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.

I am a rock,

I am an island.

Don't talk of love,

But I've heard the words before;

It's sleeping in my memory.

I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.

If I never loved I never would have cried.

I am a rock,

I am an island.

I have my books

And my poetry to protect me;

I am shielded in my armor,

Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.

I touch no one and no one touches me.

I am a rock,

I am an island.

And a rock feels no pain;

And an island never cries

This is dedicated to the people who caused me to become that island.

Hurt.....in more than one way

This has been a difficult and painful week....for more than one reason. Physical pain had been secondary to the extreme emotional pain. Since March we've lost 4 pets, 1 dog and 3 cats with 2 of them coming 5 days apart.

It's hard enough to lose 1 but 4 in less than 5 months is hard on my heart and spirit.

Medical problems with TJ have been hard on us both physically and financially. People that tell you "you KNOW I have your back", "I'll be there whenever you need me"......didn't and weren't. I didn't need anyone to drop everything they were doing and rush to our aid but thoughts, prayers and words of encouragement would have helped a great deal. The silence from some closest to me was deafening. I found out that some I thought I could "count" on failed at math.

This week I found out, through a post in a private group on Facebook that someone I had cared a great deal for and thought I could trust had been telling another member that I was *talking about her behind her back* and apparently all of my posts were about her. The other person and I took it offline and things came out in the open. Apparently this has been going on for months. This week she had received a phone call while on VACATION. WHY would you call someone on vacation to upset them? Over NOTHING. I've actually had a gut feeling for about 2 months that something just wasn't right....now I know why....and I actually know who even though the other person didn't tell me and I didn't ask. But I know. I am hurt to the bone. I don't know why they did it or what the motivation was. I don't know what to do, how to say something or if I even want to. Trust has been compromised.

I'm hurting in multiple ways. Some of it will eventually lessen and be replaced by the good memories. Some of it might be resolved. Some of it might be beyond the point of repair. Whatever happens I will get through it and be stronger because of it....

THIS is what I've been trying to say....

....but couldn't find the words. Over the last 4-5 months I found that some people that I thought would be there....weren't.

Homemade Febreeze

Last year I tried my hand at making laundry detergent...haven't bought any in 16 months. Well, this time I made "Febreeze" spray. TJ uses about 1 bottle every 2 weeks and it's about $5 a bottle....that's $130 a year. I used an empty Febreeze spray bottle to refill and made a gallon jug of it.

2 cups liquid fabric softener

1 cup baking soda

Hot tap water

Add fabric softener and baking soda to gallon jug and fill with hot tap water. Shake to mix. Fill spray bottle as needed.

Have a safe and happy 4th

Happy Birthday

I can remember this birthday celebration just as clear as if it were yesterday. You would have been 99 today. I love you and miss you.

Enough Said

Little Bit

This was Little Bit back in March 2007. He was a cream Manx. Goodbye sweetheart.

Lone Wolf

I can be your best friend but treat me like shit, screw me over, trash me to other people, etc. and I won't "forgive and forget". There is no "kiss and make up". I see people who were really screwed over by others now *friending* those people on Facebook. Why? You really think things are going to change?

Happiness isn't a destination you can drive, fly or walk to. You can't chase and catch it. *Things* aren't going to make you happy. Flitting around buying this and that because you think it's *cooler* than what you have now is not going to make you happy.

I wonder why I have some people as *friends* on Facebook. Even though we know each other we really don't do anything together. I got tired of making plans only to have you show up late or not show up at all....and when I tried to call you didn't bother to answer or return my call. Can we say R.U.D.E.???

I know who I can truly count on. I know who is just looking out for themselves. I know who is just looking for a *clique* to be a part of.

All I want is for people to be upfront and honest with me. Be *real*. I'm not a chimney, don't blow smoke up my ass.

I'm a *lone wolf* for a reason. I'm not hurt or disappointed that way.

Auto correct strikes again

Our weather forecast for later tonight....

3 sisters (of many)

Me, Cille and Kathy....much love to our sisters who aren't in the photo with us...you were in our hearts!

A Folded Flag

A Folded Flag

A servicemember's ultimate sacrifice

A family's ultimate sorrow

Memorial Day

A day to remember

A day for thanks

On behalf of a grateful nation.

� Donna Ghost Bear 2012

In the Wind

In the Wind

In the wind I am free

The cobwebs cleared from my mind

Worry and stress blown from my body

I am carefree.

In the wind my spirit is healed

The open road, like a doctor

The sun, like medicine.

In the wind I am wandering but not lost

Journeying toward the promise of a new day,

a new adventure.

In the wind.

2012 Donna Ghost Bear

Random photos 10/8/09

Just some photos from our morning walks over the last few days.....



The moon at almost 7:30 am


Flooded creek on the greenway


Pretty clouds


Everyday is a winding road


Oh come to the church in the wildwood.....



Power and light...sunrise at the greenway


More pretty clouds


Moon over the greenway

Yellow mums

Red mums

Hytop barn

TJ

A Hero came home

After almost 44 years of being listed as MIA/PKIA, CWO3 Kenneth Stancil was found, identified and returned to his family. A hero's homecoming. Closure for his family. Emotional for one amazing woman. As an 8 year old in Florida in 1970 she begged her mother for $3 to get a POW/MIA bracelet. Her classmate's brother was MIA and she wanted everybody in her class to get one. She got it and was surprised to find out it was a soldier from Chattanooga, her hometown. As a grown woman and a veteran herself, she gave that bracelet to CWO3 Stancil's family after the service today. Closure for 2 families. Welcome home CWO3 Stancil....stand down, your watch is over.